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Where Do Some People Get Their Energy?

Posted on December 30th, 2009

Yesterday morning the calls started.  The first one was from a mortgage company.  When I answered the phone the guy insisted that I had just called his company.

The second call came 10 minutes later from another mortgage company saying my phone number had shown up on his caller ID screen.  13 calls later a woman from a plastics company called, angry at how badly I had treated her on the phone.

20 calls later the police were at the house so I could file a report and I was on the phone with the phone company.  I had put a fraud alert on my credit and notified my banks.

This morning the calls started again.  I had logged 26 calls on Tuesday.  There were 9 more calls today before noon but then they stopped.

And these were only the calls from businesses that bothered to call me ‘back’.  Those that did call back said she was calling and hanging up, not talking with them and not leaving a message.

That made 35 calls in total.  I finally put a message on the phone so I didn’t have to answer all the calls.

Where do people get their energy?  This woman was somehow able to use my phone number and name to show up on the recipients caller ID.  She made over 35 calls in a 2 day period over the course of 30 hours.

I don’t have that kind of time or desire to cause that much trouble to ANYONE.  Where does that kind of time come from?

Filed under: Life after divorce | No Comments »

I Have Dating on the Brain

Posted on December 28th, 2009

You know, as much as I don’t anticipate the future of dating for me I do also want to have someone special in my life.  And, I know, that unless I do date I won’t find that someone special with whom I can share those little secrets we desperately want to share.

Like getting sympathy for the 2 inch gash in my leg after taking out the garbage and the 7 stitches that ensued; or finally finishing the contract for a one year long writing agreement that will lead to joint ventures and a book deal; or picking up a few extra writing assignments that will help to pay for the out of pocket expenses for those stitches ; or when my youngest had to have surgery to repair a broken finger; or when the night light goes out and I’m too ‘afraid’ of the dark to get up and get another one.

Some of these secrets are biggies that I want someone to share with and others are just the small things that happen in everyday life.  Those things that no one remembers the next day or the day after, but which build relationships over months and years.

So I have dating on the brain today.  Several days before the New Year.  Several days before I routinely sit down and re-evaluate the goals I set for myself the year before.

If memory serves me (and I haven’t yet looked)  I have achieved many of those goals; but in the achieving I have set new ones without celebrating the old.  This makes for a rather disconcerting feeling of never really achieving a goal but rather passing milestones without celebration.  Almost like a marathon runner who passes the finish line and continues to run to her car because she left laundry in the dryer and the oldest needs a ride to practice.

So, on the list of goals and achievements for this year is to learn how to stop and smell the roses.  Stop each day and be GRATEFUL for the blessing I have and THANKFUL for those that I don’t.   Because the ones that I don’t make me stronger.  Because God knows better than I what I need and what I want and how to tell the difference.

And on that list is also a request for a boyfriend.  Someone who shares my goals and ambitions.  Someone who will commiserate with me when the roof has a leak, the little one talks back to me and the boys start to fight.  Someone who will listen when I cry and remind to celebrate when I keep on running.

Do you know anyone like that?

Filed under: Dating and Divorce | No Comments »

It’s Christmas Eve . . .

Posted on December 24th, 2009

The house is quiet and it’s Christmas eve.  The children are visiting their father tonight and will be back tomorrow.  It’s been a busy day, even with them gone.  Cooking, wrapping presents, baking pies – feels like they are all here anyway

Well, I bit the bullet several months back and joined eHarmony.  It has been a weird experience for me.  Maybe my preferences are set to stringently but if I set them more relaxed then I’ll be matched with people I wouldn’t be interested in anyway – right?

For instance, my limits on distance are set to 60 miles and I’m pretty strong about that.  If I relax that then I’ll be matched with men who live out of state (has already happened!) and I’m not willing to develop a relationship where I won’t be able to see them except every other week or so.

So, what to do?

I’ve told my friends that I’d like to start dating again.  I’ve looked at some of the online sites like eHarmony and Plenty of Fish (free) – but without success so far.

But, this is a new year with lots of hope on the  horizon.  Never know WHAT will happen –

Filed under: Dating and Divorce | 2 Comments »